Love, D.

When I was young, I've never thought that growing up would be this hard. I didn't know it involves 'heart' and 'feelings' this much. Few more days of 2017 and 3 months left till I can finally 'restart' my life again (hopefully). For almost three years of being here, I have learnt so much, gone through so many things. Knowing people, friends became strangers, got my heart broken for few times, super hard and long cry, non-stop laughter, changed because of people and became the reason for people to change and many more. My first year being in the 20s was hard, but I've learnt a lot. Countless of 'thank you' and 'I'm sorry' to countless people. I'll put it all on my end year post. I really hope this year ends well. Love,  D.

Hi, imaginary readers. I hope it's not too late for a birthday post. Yes, I am no longer a teen (though I still claimed to be one). I'm finally 20 and hopefully wiser. Well, there are so many things that I hope I'll become especially when I've reached 20 already. Wiser, cleverer, thinner, prettier, more pious, more mature and more in everything that is good. I'm quite disappointed with what I've achieved in life so far. Seriously, there are so many people around me that have become someone and found what they want in life (I'm still searching though). Anyways, growing older made me realized that at some point in our life, the only thing that matters is yourself. Not to become self-centred, but it's unfortunately true. People forget about you, conversations become awkward, friends to strangers, finding new people and moving on. Sad isn't it? So, here's to the start of the journey of becoming an adult. Love, d. 

Well, hello my fellow imaginary readers (it's been a long time since the last time I've said this), I’ve never met someone so inspiring in my life. It’s amazing how someone can mean something in your life. Well, mean something is a heavy phrase though. More to trigger, or inspire. It’s addictive and you’ll keep finding things to answer your curiosity and amazement. The first day of my internship was quite heavy with all the thinking and remembering people’s names and faces (and those slides of basic ideas on what the company actually do). And that day, also, he opened my mind. That early. At first, it was hard to believe that he just entered the company. Because of the way he acted was so different. Then, when I knew he graduated from Australia, it strengthens my stand on ‘wow this guy must be brilliant’.   Then it happened that I knew his full name, and so I searched him on social media. I found him on Twitter and Instagram. OH MY. So freaking beautiful. Thos

Mati. Naik bulu roma rasanya bila bicara soal mati. Berita kematian tak putus putus masuk dalam telinga aku since before Ramadhan haritu. Seolah olah macam inalillahiwainnaillahirajiun tu tak pernah lekang from mulut or whatsapp. Banyak sangat berita kematian sampai buat aku fikir, 'macam mana pengakhiran aku?' Bila atuk meninggal, aku jadi saksi air mata lelaki ayah jatuh sebab kedua orang tua dah pergi meninggalkan seorang anak. Bila mak kepada rakan aku meninggal, aku terfikir macam mana kalau aku di tempat dia, kuatkah aku. Dah tu beberapa hari sebelum final pulak tu terima berita macam tu. Kuatnya dia. Bila dengar berita ayah schoolmate meninggal sebab jatuh tangga and time tu dia dekat overseas tengah belajar, buat aku fikir, macam mana kalau ada something happen bila aku dekat Nihon nanti, hmm nauzubillah.  And sekarang, bila terima berita senpai yang aku kenal, meninggal kelmarin, hmm. Taktau nak rasa apa, sebak sangat. Punca kematian, lemas. Asbab yang aku kira

Wait. I have a love-hate relationship with the word wait. They said time heals everything. They lied. A scar will always be there. No matter how long has passed, a scar is still a scar. And there are times when the scar actually bleed. Why? Because the pain is there. Covered beneath the scar. It’s just there no matter what you do. Say you broke up and met someone new, the things you’re doing or will be doing, remind you of that person. When you’re happy, sad, every single moment. You can’t just forget people over time. They’ve made their way into your book, they just live there; in a chapter or more. They won’t leave.  But, they are all there for some reasons. To teach you something or to be taught of something. Cherish them, or hate them, ignore them, or love them. Do whatever you want. They walked into your book, and so do you. You walked into theirs. Go ahead, write something in their book. Whether you want to write something nice and happy, or something sad and hurtful,