Love, D.

Assalamualaikum and hi, my imaginary readers! How's your Ramadhan so far? I really hope the holy month brings us the utmost in peace and had brought us closer to Allah not just in the month itself, but I pray that the spirit of Ramadhan remains in our hearts and lights up our souls from within. Also, I hope the remaining days of our Ramadhan will be filled with many ibadahs and hope we all get to find Laylatul Qadr (disclaimer: copy-pasting sentences from postcards I've sent out).  As this is the second year that I have spent and may or may not be the last year that I will spend Ramadhan abroad, away from my family, I've decided to write a post about it. Though I thought I have so many things to talk about which I supposed to have to, but now the words are just not coming out. Anyways, I hope when you are reading this, you are actually wondering how different it is to celebrate Ramadhan, not in the place or situation or among people that you are used to. I

Assalamualaikum and hi, my imaginary readers! Funny thing- my very first post in 2019! How are you guys, been well? These few days I’ve been here and there and emotionally unstable. I’m not sure whether it’s the time of the month or what but when I checked it’s not it (so I can’t really blame it on my menses). Come to think about it, I am at one of the peaks in my life. Not a good kind of peak but a very miserable one. Making decisions. One of the things that I’m not just not good at but also hate to do. That and also growing up. Growing up is so messy especially because it’s not a destination, it’s a journey. And it’s filled with thorns and so many falling downs.   Wish I could tell you guys, my imaginary readers, what my dilemmas are. But I think I have to deal with it on my own first. I really miss writing and will be posting a lengthy post, soon I hope. Hope it’s not too late to wish you guys happy fasting and Ramadhan al-Mubarak! Love,  D .

I stare at today's date Wondering why it looked so familiar Triggering a part of my brain Triggering a chapter of my life I hold my pen tight  Not knowing what to write Never written a poem to anyone Never thought you'd be the first one As I scribble a few words Many thoughts crossed my mind Am I being selfish Am I being unfair And so I've decided This is not a goodnight But indeed a goodbye Also, happy birthday